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April 5, 2008
Sherry Lucille
TNT Lead Blogger & Author, Love Changes
Destiny. Overcoming negative family situations. What can I do?
These are all things I’ve asked you to ponder in preceding blog
entries.
I am currently reading Convicted in the Womb by Carl Upchurch and my
only regret is that I had known about it earlier and been ready to
receive the wisdom it has to offer sooner.
Mr. Upchurch is deceased and I will never be able to tell him what a
powerful impact his work has had on me. I can relate to many of his
experiences: his revelation regarding the power of books, some of
his passions, the misinformed presumptions of others regarding him.
I also think it’s a must read for anyone seeking to “Bury the ‘N’
Word.” His true story sheds much light of this subject.
The other day a new acquaintance asked me a question that on the
face of it was not profound: who else are you coaching? (I also do
life
coaching, see ) This simple question caused me to look
at the parts of my life: like a puzzle, and put them together to see
the meaning of the whole.
I realized that I got a degree in Counseling not because I needed it
to counsel people— that’s who I am and what I do. I needed it to
certify to the world that I should be able to do it. I have recently
acquired certification as a Life Coach, again not because I needed
it to do coaching, which I do almost every day of my life, but
because I needed it to certify to the world that I should be allowed
to use my God given talent.
Like Mr. Upchurch, it took me a while to put all the pieces of ME
together. Take some time to ponder who you are and what your gifts
are. No matter what the negative voices from within or without have
told you, you have an ordained purpose in this world and it is to do
something good, if not great!
Mr. Upchurch’s book is available at
www.amazon.com
February 04, 2008
Sherry Lucille
TNT Lead Blogger & Author, Love Changes
In honor of Black History Month, start making your own history:
What can I do? I’m just a kid.
Do you have the most wonderful parents ever born, like the ones
Raven Locks and her bother Timothy found? Or do you have parents
that are just so so. No matter who is raising you, if you are old
enough to read this blog you have the power to make your life better
and to impact your future.
So you’re asking: but what can I do? Here is a list of ten things.
- Go to school and do your best there. The teachers may stink or be as
good as gold. It doesn’t matter. You are there to learn and to learn
how to learn so that you can accomplish future goals. Your job at
school is to get what they have to give (an education).
- Read, read, read. Read easy stuff so that you learn to decode words
and understand facts and information. Read hard stuff so that you
challenge yourself to go higher.
- Be clean and honest. Literally: shower, wash up, use deodorant and
brush your teeth so that you are pleasant to be around. And be a
trustworthy person: tell the truth and don’t steal so that you are
pleasant to be around.
- Be kind to everyone and expect people to be kind to you. If your
friends are not nice and refuse to be nice, find new friends. If
adults are not nice, be nice to them anyway when you have to be
around them. Perhaps your goodness will cause them to change.
- Hang around good, positive people as much as you can. The kids or
teens will be kids or teens who want to get good grades and who
think it’s good to succeed. The grown-ups will be people who love
and like other people. They say and do good things. They work hard
at home, at school or in their jobs or careers.
- When possible, avoid people who are mean and or abusive.
- Ask trusted-good people for help when you have problems. These
people may be parents, relatives, neighbors, school people, church
people and others. Keep asking for help until you get the help you
need. Try different people if the people you ask at first don’t
help.
- Pray for yourself and others. Don’t be fooled, God is real and he
rewards those who look for him and believe in him.
- Remember. Remember that one day you will be grown and able to
make your own decisions. Learn all you can so that you can improve
this world.
- And lastly, make good choices. Avoid the criminal justice system
(the new slavery), avoid early-unwed pregnancy, avoid drug and
alcohol use and abuse, avoid gangs and violence. So much of what you
do today can and will affect your tomorrow.
That’s it for now and know you are loved.
January 16, 2008
Sherry Lucille
TNT Lead Blogger & Author, Love Changes
Raven and Timmy’s Search- An Urban Fairytale
Raven Locks and her brother Timmy were out in the city one day
shopping for the perfect parents. They ventured into a well kept
high-rise apartment building and thought, “Why not start here.” So
they did.
Raven Locks, or RL as her friends liked to call her, knocked on the
first door. “Hello, is anybody here?” She called as the door gave
way to her pounding and seemed to open on its own. “Back here.” A
man called out from down the hall. RL and Timmy walked toward the
sound of his voice. The man and his wife were sitting on two chairs
staring at a television.
The man kept right on clicking the channels as he
asked the kids what they wanted. “We’re shopping for parents,” Timmy
explained. “Oh yeah,” said the woman, “we have five, you can stay if
you want.” At that moment, one her kids came crashing in, “Hey,
Mom,” he called, “the truant officer is on his way up the street:
should I put the chain on?” “Yeah,” She replied “and, Charlie, prop
this chair under the knob.”
“Too cold.” Timmy said to Raven Locks as they left the apartment
just in time for Charlie to close the door behind them.
Raven and Timmy went up the stairs to door number two. This
apartment had a heavy metal door. They had to ring the bell. Before
Timmy could press it, a woman’s voice, sharp and crisp said, “Yes,
how can I help you?” as she stood like a guard between them and her
apartment. “We’ve shopping for parents.” Timmy spouted. “Then you
are right on time, and by the way I’m Mrs. M. Dinner is at 5:00 and
a list of your chores is on the refrigerator.
You will finish all of your meals, every meal. Friends
will be screened, of course, and I have a list of places which you
must never visit or even walk by. Questions will have to be tabled
until 7:05 p.m. at which time I will have exactly 10 minutes to hear
all of your hopes and dreams. I am sure you will have no concerns
since all of your needs will be met. My husband and I make a good
living…
“Too hot!” Raven whispered as she grabbed her brother’s hand and
inched toward the door.
“I’m tired,” Timmy moaned as they departed the dreaded Mrs. M’s
meticulous apartment. “Me too,” RL agreed. “Do you think we’ll ever
find parents?”
“I don’t know,” Timmy replied, his head hanging low. So they started
down the stairs. Just as they were about to go out the door, Raven
Locks shouted, “Hey, Timmy, how about there?” “Where?” he said,
jutting his neck forward to see where she was pointing. A little off
to the right and slightly hidden by the staircase was an unassuming
brown door.
“Why not.” Timmy said. They knocked. “Hey, Mary, can
you get that?” “Sure, Erick.” The kids heard as they waited. Erick was
sitting at a small dining table helping a young boy read a book. “They
won’t want us. They already have a kid.” Timmy uttered in a most
pitiful voice.
“I heard that,” Mary said, as she pulled a wonderful
smelling pie out of the oven, “Of course, children are hard work but
our little boy Michael has wanted a big brother and sister for so
long. Let’s talk it over. It will mean working together.” She smiled,
“But we’ll play together too.”
“Just Right!” Both Raven Locks and her bother Timmy said together.
Now boys and girls, ladies and gents, we all know that this is a
fairytale and that children should never go door to door looking for
parents. We also know that most of the time the parents we have, are
the parents we keep.
So there comes a time in the life of a young person
that no matter what kind of parents you have: good, bad or in between,
you have to decide to be the best person you can be, no matter what.
And since it’s a New Year, we’ll talk about just that next time.
December 16, 2007
Sherry Lucille
TNT Lead Blogger & Author, Love Changes
Memories of Christmas
I forget that this website is for the young kids too. So today I’m
writing for you and the young at heart. Let’s take a walk down
memory lane.
Me at age 10 or thereabouts…
It’s Christmas and my brother and I are kneeling by the frosted
white tree with blue, red and green ornaments tugging on the hanging
branches. The tree is strewn with silver and gold tinsel and a
translucent plastic star glows at its crown. To give our living room
that just perfect glow, our multicolored plate-shaped wheel spinner
flashes primary colors, one at a time, from the base to the tip of
this decorated wonder.
It is the wee hours of the pre dawn. The sun hasn’t even begun to
show its face. But my little brother and I are up and anxious to see
what Santa has brought. We both eye boxes, big and square, and with
reckless abandon we rip into them. My brother is the first to
squeal, “Whoa!” His eyes are sparkling. I can tell he’s pleased.
I open my box of about the same size and shape. Tears of joy well
in my eyes, “Batgirl.” The white leather boots tumble from the box.
The toes are pointed and the emblem of the caped-crusader side-kick
prove that these are the real thing. G—pulls out his Robin boots and
we are thrilled to find out (by phone) that our favorite cousin
across town has the Batman boots.
This is already the best Christmas that anyone has ever had but it
gets better. Later, our two families, my cousin’s and mine, go
downtown to one of the major department stores, maybe Marshal
Fields, and we take a picture with Santa; Batman, Robin and me, the
Batgirl.
You know what makes Christmas so magical? Unforgettable memories
like these. So whether you have a little or a lot don’t forget to
feel the magic and to be very grateful.
December 2, 2007
Sherry Lucille
TNT Lead Blogger & Author, Love Changes
In my last blog I talked about Thanks and as promised, today
I’ll talk about Giving. And because of a recent event that happened
in my life, I have a slightly different slant than I had originally
planned. See if you can groove on this vibe. I know 70ties talk. You
don’t get it, I’m old, I mean older. Anyway, see if you can
understand what I’m trying to say. Thanks.
I was served a small treat from the point of a
quadrupled edged dagger, as you can imagine it cut me when I tried to
eat…
This is a metaphor for a letter that I recently
received from a friend. (?) She vented some long held beliefs and
hostilities regarding me. Some were valid, though I never intended to
hurt her, and some were just mean and unfounded. If she had meant to
give me the gift of correction, I could have received it—difficult
though it was—but correction without love or caring is hard to chew
and even harder to swallow.
So my suggestion regarding Giving—Let your giving be
sincere and from a loving heart. Give because you care and you want to
help. Giving that is forced or begrudging can not help the giver and
will not be received well by the person on whom it is bestowed.
Love well, give well, serve well, the world is waiting
for your gifts. Patience, kindness, wisdom, forgiveness and hard work,
these are all needed.
Looking for some
place to give in, try these:
 | A family member or friend who needs a service |
| Your local place of worship |
| Food pantries |
| Woman’s shelters |
| Homeless shelters |
| Literacy foundations |
| Local schools |
| Nursing homes |
Genuine kindness: there is no cure for it, nor should
there be.
Ps: Have you received a sweet-sour gift lately? Eat
the good, toss the sour and live better because of it. That’s what I
plan to do.
November 16, 2007
Sherry Lucille
TNT Lead Blogger & Author, Love Changes
It’s November, the month in we which we the people of the United
States celebrate Thanksgiving. Thanks for the new land and new
beginnings. You know there was a time in this country where most of
us celebrated the same things without question or reservation, these
days many things have taken on one political view or another,
sometimes setting us one against the other. This little blog today
will have none of that. I simply want to share some personal
reflections with you about the two words that make up our rapidly
approaching holiday: Thanks and Giving. For today, Thanks:
I just returned from a rode trip to Philadelphia with my husband. I
was doing research on Kimberlane Steel’s background. She is a
character from my new and yet unnamed novel; two of three in the
Love series. Anyway, while we were on the East Coast, we visited
with a childhood friend of mine. We were raised on the south side of
Chicago, like two peas in a pod, my friend and me. Many miles
separate us but our hearts are still knit in a common past and
history.
I went with my husband to my friend’s new and very lavish home. It’s
so big that she needs and has “help”; you know people to help her
keep things in order and I ain’t mad at her. If I could afford it,
I’d have help too, right here in my little house.
When we were standing outside of the very nice and not too cheap
restaurant that she and her husband had treated me and my husband
to, I gave her a big hug and said to her, “I am genuinely happy for
you and your success.” With arms wrapped tightly around me, she gave
a similar speech, “And I am happy for you, happy for both of
us…happy for what God has allowed us to achieve.”
Now you have to know our history to understand the monumental
significance of these few words. We were poor: both of us, both of
our families. And though I am not rich… yet, not like she is anyway,
I am far, far from poor. And I am sooooo thankful.
I am thankful for family, friends, health, a sound mind and most of
all for God and the love and wisdom that comes from knowing him,
really knowing him. So if I were to share with you the keys to my
success and the success of my friend, they would be these:
And you can bet your life that sometime during this season while I
am sitting around eating turkey, sweet potato pie (I like my recipe
best), macaroni, and cranberry sauce, I will be sure to give thanks
for all my many blessings, including the land in which I live and
the people, all the people, who live here with me.
Thanks. Next blog: Giving!
October 30, 2007
Sherry Lucille
TNT Lead Blogger & Author, Love Changes
Trick or Treat for the Young Man.
Sex, should I or shouldn’t I?
Everybody’s doing it, right or wrong?
Having sex does not make you a man. Commitment does that. Taking
care of business does that. Knowing and doing right instead of wrong
does that.
I’m not a man and I am not going to presume to tell you how a man
thinks, though I think I know, wink, wink…
But for you young men trying to learn right from wrong and for you
older men trying to get into a wise woman’s head, here are some
things to think about.
| Sex, love and commitment should be part of the same package. |
| What if it was your sister, mother, or friend who was getting
it (sex) and not getting it (love)? |
| Do you know any men with unplanned and, too often, unwanted
children? |
| What is that child’s life like? What could it be like if the
parents planned, wanted, and cared for it? |
| How about Aids and other sexually transmitted diseases? It’s
not always the other guy who gets them. |
The next time you engage in sex for sex’s sake, ask yourself,
is this a Trick or a Treat?
Oh, and men can be taken advantage of too, physically and
emotionally. Make sure you are not
falling into that trap.
October 23, 2007
Sherry Lucille
TNT Lead Blogger & Author, Love Changes
In honor of Halloween, I thought I’d discuss a different kind of
Trick or Treat: a kind that may be more meaningful to you. Let’s
talk about sex.
Everybody’s doing it. Right, or wrong?
First I want to address the young ladies and get straight to the
point. Sex in the context of love will elevate you to a place of
honor and elegance. Outside of love, sex will debase you and drag
your soul to a place of despair.
Does she really believe this stuff? I do. I have seen
what loveless sex can do to a woman’s mind, body and soul;
it doesn’t matter if she is young or old.
You say he loves you. Let’s examine that. Love is a commitment to
honor and cherish, to be true to, to partner with. Is this what you
are getting in your relationship? Check list time:
| He talks to me respectfully at all times. |
| He handles me with care, physically. |
| He never curses me or raises a hand to strike me. |
| He is faithful. There are no other women that he kisses, holds
or touches in a sensual way. |
| He listens, he cares. |
| He is intimate with me away from the physical realm. He tells me
his dreams, fears and goals. |
| He gives more than he takes. |
The list is exhaustive. But how does your man stack up so far?
Trick or Treat?
September 25,
2007
Sherry Lucille
TNT Lead Blogger & Author, Love Changes
Wrap Around! So many things happen in our world. We see but
don’t see. It’s important for us to wrap our minds around events
happening in our world. It’s important for us to see…
Use me as an example to make better decisions and better judgments -
a paraphrase from Michael Vick. By now you have all heard about the
Atlanta Falcon’s Quarterback pleading guilty to dog-fighting and
gambling charges: federal offences. He was one of the highest paid
football players in the NBA and he threw it all away because he
wanted something he didn’t have. And the pity of it is: that before
now,
he didn’t even know what it was he didn’t have.
| What do you think Michael Vick was looking for? |
| Did he find it? |
| What has Michael Vick learned from his problems? |
Many young people regard professional athletes as role models. Is
this a good idea? Why or why not?
Who are your role models? Have you asked yourself why?
September 9,
2007
Sherry Lucille
TNT Lead Blogger & Author, Love Changes
My name is Sherry Lucille and I am the author of the novel, Love
Changes, a story about love in all its facets. At this moment
I am looking out the window observing the weather. After a summer so
parched with dry days, we had wondered if it would ever rain again
and now it’s so wet we are in danger of flooding.
So it is with the weather, so it is with life. One day can be,
and often is, totally different from the last. So how can we
make the most of this ever changing existence of ours? My
suggestion: live your purpose. When you are doing what you are
created to do, you are never out of sync with the universe.
Things may not always go your way but they’ll have a way of coming
back around; satisfaction and hope will always be in your grasp.
May
29, 2007
Bill Breitsprecher,
Webmaster
Media Specialist:
Youth, Technology
and Schools.
Its almost the end of the school year - a great time to reflect on
what we did, what we learned, and what we would like to do next
year.
I hope everyone has fun this summer, but before you "check out",
please join us on HEART AND SOUL, a community forum on Madison's
"The Pulse" 1670 am.
I will join Richard Brown and Betty Banks and we will talk about
technology as a tool for learning. We would really like to
hear what you think.
What kinds of technology are you interested? Where to you
learn the new "killer applications." How do you use technology
in school? Is there anything about technology at school you
would like to see changed?
Please join the discussion and tell us what you think. At CLUB
TNT - we "use the media of entertainment to inform and education."
Increasingly, performing arts use technology to create, record, and
share talent.
We believe that sharing technology is also an important part of
learning. For more information and great links about
technology and youth, click
HERE - I've created a special Web page to support our
radio dialog. Please join us and tell us what you think!
 May 16, 2007
Bill Breitsprecher,
Webmaster
Media Specialist
Search CLUB TNT
with GOOGLE!
Since 2003, when I took over as the WEBMASTER for CLUB TNT,
the site has really grown. There are now HUNDREDS of pages of
resources that fall under the
TNT RESOURCES
family of subwebs, covering, academics, recreational reading,
careers, college prep, college transition, research & reference,
games and virtual tours, information about substance and alcohol
abuse, TNT online video.
In order to provide better access to this
information, I have added a new TNT SEARCH ENGINE – it is powered by
the best Web-crawler available – GOOGLE!
Its a great addition to our Web - the best Internet
search engine, searching our online resources at CLUB TNT – please
give it a try.
The “search box” is in the upper left of each page,
right below the TNT logo – just enter the keywords you wish to use
and you will instantly be searching the entire “family” of TNT Web
resources. To return to CLUB TNT, just click on the TNT logo at the
top of the search results.
Please check it out… and thanks for supporting youth
via CLUB TNT! I appreciate an opportunity to work with everyone.
April 1, 2007
Bill Breitsprecher,
Webmaster& Media Specialist
TNT Web Becoming Busy Place
THANKS EVERYBODY FOR YOUR SUPPORT!
Our CLUB TNT Web is becoming a busy place - this year we are
averaging almost 5,500 unique visitors EACH MONTH!
In the past year - we have had OVER 1 MILLION HITS AT OUR WEBSITE!
Thanks to everyone that stops by and "gives us a look." The
growth in the way people use our online resources is a result of the
many different resources we present here.
Mr. B's
Beginning Algebra Web is consistently the most visited section
at CLUB TNT.
This is closely followed by our
TNT
Book Club and
Brain Matters Webs. TNT
Videos Online, On-Demand 24/7,
Mr. B's Career
Web, and
The
Children's March pages are also extremely popular as are our
TNT
Resources with the
TNT
Collegian and research pathfinders for:
Our Web gets visitors from all over the country. Schools and
even publishing companies link to our resources now. Many
visitors find us online directly from our URL -
www.clubtnt.org which probably
means they watch our show or have heard about our good work.
A large number of our visits come from search engines - for example,
as of today (April 1, 2007) if you search for
"COLLEGE MATH" at yahoo.com - our math pages are the #2 hit!
As the Webmaster I am humbled and grateful - it is awesome to see that
the work that goes into creating and maintaining the resources here
are being used all over the country - sometimes - even getting visits
from around the world!
We appreciate everyone's support - I hope to be able to continue to
support CLUB TNT and the information needs of our viewers and online
visitors. It has been my goal to make
www.clubtnt.org an "information
portal" and the visitor logs at our Website show that we are
succeeding - THANKS AGAIN!
January
27, 2007
Bill Breitsprecher
Webmaster& Media Specialist
Youth & Technology
Celebrating Youth
Betty Banks, myself, and some of the other members of CLUB TNT
are participating in a panel discussion about technology at
CELEBRATING YOUTH 2007, Monona Terrace, Madison, Wisconsin.
I am putting together a
set of
online resources to share information about the Internet, Web
design, and variety of other topics and issues related to creating
and maintaining Web pages. If anyone has links,
resources, or ideas to share, please contact me at
webmaster@clubtnt.org
This is an exciting time to be growing up or be a
parent or educator - technology is making so many things possible.
Many times, when parents and educators talk about youth and
technology, the dialog gets dragged down in fears, intimidation, and
concerns instead of the enthusiasm that today's youth share.
Let's face it - each generation faces unique
challenges. If we are honest with ourselves, we have to admit
that our parents and teachers expressed concerns about the emerging
technologies of our day - things like telephones, movies, radio,
rock music, and TV. Many predicted doom and gloom - some have
blamed these technologies for a host of problems. With
hindsight, we see that most were able to deal with these changes and
make responsible choices.
No, technology is not good or bad and putting new
ideas "back in the box" is not an option. Let's talk about
concerns and issues relating to new technologies, but let's also not
fear them. Sharing technology is a wonderful experience for
people of all ages.
This Webmaster is grateful to have had an
opportunity to work with hundreds of teenagers as a computer teacher
and library media specialist. Being around the creative,
enthusiastic attitudes of young adults has constantly challenged and
inspired me to extend my skills and knowledge.
Perhaps even more importantly, the youths that I
have worked with have taught me to be humble, which to me means
teachable. I am thankful that technology has taught me to keep
an open mind and maintain a willingness to learn. Isn't that
really the greatest gift we can share with our children?
November 7, 2006
Bill Breitsprecher
Webmaster& Media Specialist
Career Development
When is the best time to start thinking about careers?
Its NEVER too early. Career development is a process, an
understanding that we develop over time. It isn't just youths,
teenagers, young adults, or even recent college grads that need to
think about it.
Adults of all ages find themselves making career
decisions or changes too - that's why you can never start too soon.
Its a process that really never stops. We have added a new
Career Exploration Web
to the many resources we share at
Club TNT.
Its full of information,
resources, and links to help anyone look at career choices.
There are sections for
career activities,
career clusters,
online resources,
"soft skills",
careers in the news,
job hunting, and the
DPI learning standards for
Wisconsin's public schools.
Please check it out and, as always, let us know what
you think. We always appreciate hearing from you - email me at webmaster@clubtnt.org.
Thanks!
 October 20,
2006
Bill Breitsprecher
Webmaster& Media Specialist
We have added a new section to our Webpage,
TNT Video Online On Demand, 24/7.
Please be sure to check it out - the video files are uploaded to
stream off of Google's video hosting services. We have embedded
Google Media Players into our pages, so you should be able to view
them from any computer with any browser.
These are large streaming files - you will probably
need to be on broadband. If you want to watch our videos, but
they don't stream properly on your computer, just save the files on
your computer to view them -- right-click on the link, downloading to
your computer. You will also need
Google's video player - click
HERE
for details.
These are not the actual episodes that air each week
on My Madison 14 - we've decided to upload clips from various
shows. Right now, we have some of our On Location videos.
In the future, we will be adding performances by Club TNT members,
public service announcements, and clips from each of our "stages"
(Express Yourself, Rapper's Delight, etc.)
We hope that you enjoy watching Club TNT online
- please share your thoughts with us. Are there any clips you
would like to see us feature? Is there anything going on in your
community that you would like us cover "on location"?
We always appreciate hearing from you - email me at
webmaster@clubtnt.org.
Thanks!
 September
26, 2006
Bill Breitsprecher
Webmaster& Media Specialist
STREAMING VIDEO IS HERE!
In the past, CLUB TNT has been careful about the types of graphics
and files we have featured on our Web page. After all, we are
excited to be able to share information about the show with viewers
and want our Web to load reasonably well for everyone, whether on
dial-up or broadband.
We still want to communicate with everyone, though we
have to acknowledge that multi-media is an important part of today's
Web experience. Video hosting services are the fastest growing
segment of the Internet. Over the coming weeks, we will start
featuring more clips like the one at the top of this
page.
We have chosen to upload our videos to Google - that
way, we can "embed" them into our Web page in a format that is
compatible with all computer platforms and browsers. If you have
any problems viewing these videos online, just save them to your
computer to view them -- right-click on the link, downloading to your
computer. You will need
Google's video player - click
HERE
for details.
We are still deciding what types of videos to feature.
Should we make each episode (1 hour) available 24/7 to view "on
demand" or would you prefer that we kept more, shorter clips online,
organized so that viewers can more easily "pick and choose" what they
would like to see?
Please let us know what you think - email me at
webmaster@clubtnt.org.
In any case, we are glad to continue expanding the resources and
formats of information at our Website. Please check back soon to
see the new things we have in store for you - THANKS AGAIN FOR YOUR
SUPPORT!
July 24, 2006
Nia, TNT Lead Blogger
I Care
The other day, while sitting outside catching up on my summer
reading, I heard a young woman boldly proclaim, “I don't care what
other people think of me." As I peered from the corner of my eye with
disbelief and raised eyebrow to boot, I thought to myself, how
liberating it must be to not be concerned about other people's
opinion.
Then my thoughts drifted to what my life would be like
if I could navigate with an I-don't-care-what-other-people-think-of-me
attitude and then reality hit me. My life would probably lack depth
and the lack of depth would be accompanied by a multitude of troubles.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with caring about
what other people think of you. I think people should care what other
people think of them to a certain extent. I think that not caring
about what other people think is the problem with too many people
today. Many people simply don’t care enough about what other people
think of them and it is reflected in their behavior.
Caring about what other people think has kept me out
of some precarious situations as a teen and I am very thankful that I
have been hard wired to care about what other people think of me.
I know I will never be like some people who do not
care about what other people think about them, that’s just not me.
However as contradictory as this may be, as I have matured, I have
come to learn that what is most important to me at least at this stage
of my life is not so much what others think of me, but what I think of
myself that matters most.....I don’t want to be a disappointment to
myself.
July 8, 2006
Nia, TNT Lead Blogger
We wear the mask that grins and lies,
It hides our cheeks and shades our eyes,-
This debt we pay to human guile;
With torn and bleeding hearts we smile,
And mouth with myriad subtleties.
We wear the mask
[Excerpt from We Wear the Mask, by Paul Laurence
Dunbar]
One of many things I have come to learn about myself, as I continue on
this journey of self-discovery, is how masterful I am at masking.
Masking who I am to placate others, to fit in, to not stand apart,
playing down my strengths and illuminating my weaknesses, to put
others at ease. Why do I mask? Is this inherent to the black
experience and how does being black and female compound this
phenomena.
I don't have all the answers, but what I do know is
that I have been masking for so long, that it has become second
nature, like a survival technique. A survival technique that creates
conflict because of it's duality and dichotomy. It is my hopes to one
day completely reconcile this double consciousness, but until then, I
wear the mask.
July 8, 2006
Nia, TNT Lead Blogger
When I discover who I am, I'll be free.
~Ralph Ellison~
This quote by Ralph Ellison, author of Invisible Man
written in 1952 has been resonating with me all week. It is a quote
that is incredibly profound and poignant. It speaks volumes and has
been very instrumental in my personal growth.
Below are some of my thoughts, which may be
nonsensical to you, but have proven to be very purposeful and
meaningful to me.
When: Indicative of an appointed time, date or
place.
I: Identity. Me, myself and I. Ego and id.
Discover: To find, the art of searching.
Who: A question.
I: The essence that dwells within.
Am: I am, because you are.
I'll: I will, a promise for the future.
Be: The art of being, sounds simplistic; yet it
is fraught with complexity in a world that demands conformity.
Free: Completely liberated mind, body and soul,
without parameters, borders, and boundaries, infinite
possibilities..limitless.
That's what I am striving to be completely liberated
and so that I can fulfill my greatest potential!
If you have not read
Invisible Man, now is the perfect time to pick it up and add to
your summer reading list. The themes in
Invisible Man (Amazon link) are universal and timeless...check it
out!
June 29, 2006
Nia, TNT Lead Blogger
You Get What You
Need When You Need It.
Last weekend, I decided to visit Barnes & Noble to see what new
books had come in since the last time I visited. While there, I came
across a book with a title that really got my attention. The title of
the book was QBQ! The Question Behind the Question: Practicing
Personal Accountability in Work and in Life by, John Miller. What
an interesting book!
I have always been a firm believer that you get what
you need when you need it and this book was exactly what I needed
personally and professionally. Much of the information shared in QBQ
was simple, sage and pragmatic advice. QBQ did not come across as
preachy, but as contradictory as this may be, QBQ did remind me of a
sermon I had heard many times before at church.....you know the one
about judging others....taking the speck out of your own eye and being
a hypocrite.
I highly recommend this book to anyone who has found
themselves stuck in a pattern of blaming and victimhood. This book
will help to direct your focus off of others and things that are out
of your control and refocus you on YOU.
Check out the
QBQ website if you are interesting in learn more about this book
and making some changes in your own life.
June 22, 2006
Nia, TNT Lead Blogger
Valuing Diversity....
What You Learn
Something New Everyday.
Just when I was beginning to think that I understood what people
meant, when they said, "I really value the diversity here"....here
being good old Madison, I found myself engaged in a heated discussion
about a very controversial topic, that completely dismantled the
little bit of understanding I had developed about this idea of
"valuing diversity".
Broadly defined, valuing diversity to me means
appreciating difference. However, based on the very intense
conversation I had with someone about this very idea of valuing
diversity, (as it pertains to Madison) I have come to learn that
valuing diversity as it relates to Madison has nothing to do with race
and everything to do with
Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Transgender
community in Madison
(LGBT) ....so I am told.
Go figure. You learn something new everyday!
I'm not sure that I buy this idea, that valuing
diversity in Madison is only relative to the LGBT community. I have
found many Madisonians to be rigid thinkers, but this just seems too
rigid to believe. My personal observation is that, as it pertains to
Madison, valuing diversity means appreciating difference...just as it
means anywhere else.
However, the problem comes in when that difference,
whatever that difference might be is viewed as inadequate, inferior,
or deficient and for me that is the viewpoint that is most salient and
definitely hurtful.
June 15, 2006
Nia, TNT Lead Blogger
Valuing Diversity....What Does that Really Mean?
I swear if I hear one more person say, " I really value the
diversity here", I think I am going to scream! And what does
that-"valuing diversity" really mean anyway? How does that translate
on an individual level?
I have been living here in Madison for a little over
two years and have seen countless advertisements for classes or
trainings on race, racism, racial healing...yet, the race relations in
Madison are no better here, than they are anywhere else, despite the
pervasive liberalism and progressivism that seems to permeate this
college town.
Quite frankly living....correction: coexisting in
Madison and navigating this lily white terrain as a black women has
meant living in isolation. It has meant rootlessness and a real loss
of true connection with people who look like me... a loss of
connection even on the most fundamental level and that is very
disconcerting and disheartening.
June 7, 2006
Bill Breitsprecher
TNT Webmaster
Our New Web is Online!
Putting a TV show on the air each week is a lot of work, even
during the "remix" part of the season. While we have wanted to
update our Web for a while, getting final confirmation of the changes
and the news we want to share takes time. This is a
collaborative project.
We're ready for for a "new look." Gratefully, we have
finally gotten this version of the NEW Club TNT web together.
It is still a "work in progress." We are planning new
features and working on obtaining more bandwidth so we can add video
and audio clips from the show.
We are using many more graphics, "icons" to
better illustrate the depth and scope of the many resources here.
Be sure to check them out -- TNT Resources
have all been updated with more links; all are current.
Please also take a look at our
Prevention Concert
- this will be a big event. We are proud to feature Sly's Family
Stone - be sure to check back because we hope to have some more
exciting news about the concert! We also will be featuring
regular blog updates again, sharing experience, strength, and hope.
Click
HERE to see blog entries from our archive.
February 20, 2006
Nia, TNT Lead Blogger
Choose Your Words Wisely
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt
me. Words will never hurt me? Do you remember this childhood saying? I
do. I didn't believe it then and I certainly don't believe it now.
| Words are inspiring. |
| Words are empowering. |
| Words have the ability to render you
powerful or powerless. |
One of my favorite sayings is by Susan L. Taylor, she
says, "Words have the power to wound or to heal, to attract or repel,
and [I must] think before I speak, weigh my words, because once spent
they can't be retrieved.
Choose your words wisely!
February 15, 2006
Nia, TNT Lead Blogger
Freeman Calls Black History Month Ridiculous:
The Only
Way to get Rid of Racism is to "Stop Talking About It."
Morgan Freeman's
recent
interview on 60 Minutes really struck a cord with me, which is why
I have chosen to revisit it. In addition to stating that Black History
Month is 'ridiculous', Mr. Freeman says:
"There is no "white history month," and says the
only way to get rid of racism is to "stop talking about it."
No white history month?
Are you kidding me? Don't be ridiculous Mr. Freeman,
of course there is no month designated as "white history month". White
history is celebrated eleven months out of the year....sarcasm, of
course. Seriously, I think Mr. Freeman is missing the point. The
reason we have black history month and no white history month is
because our history (my history) was omitted from the history books
which is why Dr. Woodson created Negro History Week, which later
evolved into Black History Month. As much as I abhor the idea of still
needing Black History Month, this simply and sadly is reality. Until
the history writers recognize that our history is a shared history and
that our history is America's history and include our history...Black
History month is still needed.
The only way to get rid of racism is to stop talking about it?
Stop talking about racism? This assertion is
absolutely ridiculous ! How does not talking about race, help race
relations? In my opinion, the best way to combat the impact or affects
of racism is by engaging in open, honest, meaningful and purposeful
discussion about race and racism.
If I don't talk to you about your thoughts about
race/racism and you don't talk to me about my thoughts on race/racism,
how are we ever going to arrive at the bridge of understanding, if we
do not cross it together? How are we ever going to be able to relate
to one another if we don't talk about this social construct that
impacts us all?
Professor Lani Guinier of Harvard once said, "As a
country, we are in a state of denial about issues of race and racism.
And too many of our leaders have concluded that the way to remedy
racism is to simply stop talking about race." I'm afraid that Mr.
Freeman to has concluded the same, which leads me to believe that he
too must be in denial about race relations. Although I respect Mr.
Freeman as an actor, I believe that he is simply dead wrong about this
issue!
February 12, 2006
Nia, TNT Lead Blogger
Remembering the 'First Lady
of the Civil Rights Movement'
First LADY.....Mrs. King was a lady in every sense of the word!
Coretta Scott King was a woman of strength. She was elegance, grace
and dignity personified. She was a wonderful example to ALL women, but
for me, as a woman of color, she represents possibility and the
fulfillment of a dream. Mrs. King's example reminds me that I am not a
second class citizen and that I have a voice that deserves to be
heard.
She was a champion....a champion of justice-racial,
social and economic for all people. While here, Mrs. King sowed plenty
of good seeds in fertile soil and I earnestly believe that she is
resting in PEACE! She has left us with a wonderful legacy and it is up
to us to take up the struggle and continue to work for equality,
justice and peace.
Thank you for your wonderful example Mrs. King.
We love you for your unconditional and unwavering
sacrifice.
We honor you and we'll miss you!
January 30, 2006
Nia, TNT Lead Blogger
I Am More Than My Hair
Today, someone sent me a link to India Arie’s new song entitled,
I Am Not My Hair, because they thought I would enjoy the
lyrics, since I am a natural-haired woman. Guess what? They were
correct! I did enjoy the lyrics, not because of my hair choice, but
because the song has resonance for me.
I am just in awe of the lyrics….and the artist too.
Although the title of the song is very simplistic, the lyrics provide
the listener with a very thought-provoking message. The chorus to
I Am Not My Hair is:
I am not my hair
I am not this skin
I am not your expectations no no
I am not my hair
I am not this skin
I am the soul that lives within
These are powerful lyrics!
Thank you Ms Arie for articulating sentiments shared
by many women, but in particular black women. The significance or
obsession with hair is far too prevalent in the black community. Good
hair, bad hair, long hair, short hair, relaxed hair, natural hair,
weaved hair... .it’s all too much!
Who knew that something as simple and inconsequential
as a hair choice could or even would, become so important to other
people? I have had people make assumptions about my dietary habits,
philosophy, educational background, sexual orientation, political
affiliation, spiritual belief or practices and in general my lifestyle
and etc. all because of my personal hair choice. It seems as though
they can’t see me. They can only see my hair.
I AM NOT MY HAIR!
This is a great song and the message is not unique to
the “black experience”...the message is a universal one. Everyone can
relate to wanting others to see them for who they are....and not being
defined by a physical attribute.
I AM MORE THAN MY HAIR!
January 23, 2006
Nia, TNT Lead Blogger
Don't Let Others Define You
The other day someone told me that they thought I was
confrontational and it really rocked me to the core. I readily admit
that I have some character flaws, which I am working on, but,
confrontational? Me? How can that be? When did I become
confrontational?
Needless to say, I took to heart this person's
criticism, so much so that I began to doubt myself and I sought the
opinions of a select few, who confirmed what I already knew to be the
truth. And the truth of the matter is, I am not confrontational!
Assertive, passionate, and extremely vocal-ABSOLUTELY!
Confrontational? Well, suffice it to say that's not me.
Lesson learned-Don't let others define you, which
reminds me of one of my favorite quotes by Audre Lorde:
"If I didn't define myself for myself, I would
be crunched into other people's fantasies for me and eaten alive."
I almost got crunched up and eaten alive for someone
else's use and to my personal detriment. Thank goodness, I came to my
senses.
January 17, 2006
Nia, TNT Lead Blogger
In the Spirit of Unity & Service:
Remember! Celebrate! Act!
Remember! Celebrate Act! This is the charge given to us by Dr.
King's family. For those of you fortunate enough to have Dr. King's
birthday off, I implore you to take the day on, NOT off, in service to
your community.
Dr King said, "Everybody can be great, because
everybody can serve. You don't have to have a college degree to serve.
You don't have to have to make your subject and your verb agree to
serve. You don't have to know about Plato and Aristotle to serve. You
don't have to know Einstein's "Theory of Relativity" to serve. You
don't have to know the Second Theory of Thermal Dynamics in Physics to
serve. You only need a heart full of grace, a soul generated by love,
and you can be that servant."
Excerpted from "The Drum Major Instinct", a sermon by
Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr., 1968. Available on CD and print in A
Knock At Midnight: Inspiration from the Great Sermons of Reverend
Martin Luther King, Jr.
If you are not sure what you can do to be great,
here's just a few suggestions to help you celebrate and honor the
legacy of Dr. King, not just on the holiday, but everyday:
For those of you who have to work on Dr. King's
Holiday, you still can celebrate and honor the legacy of Dr. King
during your work day (with the permission of your employer of course).
For example, you can organize (with the help of interested coworkers)
a special event over the lunch hour to honor the memory of Dr. King in
your break room, conference room or alternative meeting space and
invite a speaker who is well-informed about Dr. King to come and speak
at your event. This may seem elementary to some, but at the close of
the event, each person in attendance can share what Dr. King means to
them or how they are keeping his legacy alive in their every day life.
Regardless if you have the day off, or on-I encourage
you to do something constructive to commemorate the legacy of Dr.
King. Many people like U. S. Representative John Conyers, Stevie
Wonder and a host of others waged a 15 year battle to convince
legislators to acknowledge Dr. King's birthday as a federal holiday.
In 1983, then President Ronald Reagan enacted a law making Dr. King's
birthday a national holiday, which was not observed nationally until
January 1986.
It would be a shame if we allowed this hard fought
battle along with Dr. King's ultimate sacrifice-his life be in vain.
Do something purposeful and meaningful to celebrate the ?drum major
for justice?. Take the day on, NOT off!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DR. KING!
"Happy Birthday"
You know it doesn't make much sense
There ought to be a law against
Anyone who takes offense
At a day in your celebration
Cause we all know in our minds
That there ought to be a time
That we can set aside
To show just how much we love you
And I'm sure you would agree
It couldn't fit more perfectly
Than to have a world party on the day you came to be
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday
I just never understood
How a man who died for good
Could not have a day that would
Be set aside for his recognition
Because it should never be
Just because some cannot see
The dream as clear as he
that they should make it become an illusion
And we all know everything
That he stood for time will bring
For in peace our hearts will sing
Thanks to Martin Luther King
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday
Why has there never been a holiday
Where peace is celebrated
all throughout the world
The time is overdue
For people like me and you
Who know the way to truth
Is love and unity to all God's children
It should never be a great event
And the whole day should be spent
In full remembrance
Of those who lived and died for the oneness of all people
So let us all begin
We know that love can win
Let it out don't hold it in
Sing it loud as you can
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday
Happy birthday
Happy birthday
Happy birthday
Ooh yeah
Happy birthday...
We know the key to unify all people
Is in the dream that you had so long ago
That lives in all of the hearts of people
That believe in unity
We'll make the dream become a reality
I know we will
Because our hearts tell us so
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DR. KING!
Lyrics to Happy Birthday were written by Stevie
Wonder and appear on his CD entitled Hotter Than July.
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